"We're Going on Vacation!"

Oh, I love Christmastime even though it throws every routine off. We've had a very busy past few weeks, and an even busier weekend with family and friends. I worked one day today and then I'm off again two more days. As part of the kids' Christmas gift, we are taking them for a night to an indoor waterpark. We're pretty excited. We wrapped up one of their bathing suits, flip flops, and a note in a box and made them open it up together after all the other Christmas gifts were opened. Ashleigh of course understood right away. When she told Jay-R we were going to a hotel, he jumped up and down and exclaimed, "We're going on vacation!!!" Both of the kids love water, so we'll have a great time. Kory is playing with the new GPS trying to figure out an alternative route than we normally take. That in and of itself should make the trip interesting! He always gets us lost when he does that, but I guess that's the point of the GPS...so we don't get lost! When we return, I'll post some Christmas pictures and waterpark pictures! Enjoy the rest of your holiday season!

Merry Christmas!

Wishing you and your family a very Merry Christmas!!! We had a wonderful Christmas morning! The kids let us sleep until 9:30 am! We had a late night after the late Christmas eve service. Jay-R was soooo excited to see all the presents and he has been playing with everything. We feel so blessed to have our two children!

But, I was reminded this morning of all the children who don't have mommies and daddies this Christmas morning. I heard this song on the radio. Please take a moment and listen to it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mnRNP0Qipws

This brings tears to me and touches me so much...I know we are going to adopt again.

Merry Christmas! I'll post pictures soon...now it's off to my family's!

Parol Making Websites/Philippines Christmas

Here are some websites we found helpful when researching Filipino Christmas traditions:

http://hubpages.com/hub/Parol---Filipino-Christmas-Lantern-

http://www.seasite.niu.edu/Tagalog/Cynthia/festivals/philippine_christmas.htm#Sino%20si%20Santa%20Klaus?

http://www.myparol.com/myparol/parolkit.html

http://cdn.dickblick.com/lessonplans/filipino-parol/filipino-parol-parol-stars.pdf

http://filipino.biz.ph/tourism/pasko.html

They were all filled with great information!!! If anyone knows of any other great websites, let me know!!!
Sorry....haven't had much time to be on the computer let alone blog! I love Christmas but it's a busy time at work and home! I'll post some Christmas pictures soon!

Finalization!!!!

We had our court date, today, Tuesday, December 15th for the finalization of Jay-R's adoption. He wore his barong to mark the importance of the day of going to tourt (as he called it). It was short, sweet, and final. He has been our little boy since we first laid eyes on his picture September 2, 2008, but now he is legally ours, legally an Allison, and legally a US citizen. Or, as he told me, "Mom, don't forget the A." Okay, legally a USA citizen! We celebrated with ice cream. What a sweet Christmas present. And, for all of you bloggy friends waiting, I am praying for you!

Sleep Success!

Finally, Jay-R is going to sleep in his bedroom at night by himself without panicking that no one is upstairs. There is the initial, "I want someone upstairs with me." Then, I reassure him he is fine and we are all downstairs if he needs anything. Then there is the hug and kiss, then another, the "I love yous" and then I flip the light off. Then, minutes later, a sleeping little boy. I think we owe Ate Ashleigh a big thank for the teddy bear Christmas lights she strung in his room. These have been a huge incentive to encouraging him to go to sleep. Also, a little bribery that he can have a small piece of candy after he eats breakfast doesn't hurt either. I know, candy in the morning is awful, but the incentive is working, he brushes his teeth well, and we are all getting sleep! Life is good! :)

Happy Birthday Ashleigh!

Ashleigh turned 12 today...where has the time gone? She is growing up so fast!

I love this picture of her....I took it at the sand dunes a few months ago (obviously by the way she is dressed) but she just looks so grown up!

We had the youth group Christmas party tonight, and she was embarrassed by the group singing to her and another girl whose birthday is tomorrow. She'll celebrate with a few school friends this weekend and some alone time with mom and dad while Jay-R goes to his church children's practice.

Happy Birthday Ashleigh!!!!

"It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas!"

It's beginning to look and feel a lot like Christmas in the Allison household. Sunday, we made our first parol, the traditional Filipino Christmas decoration. It represents the star of Bethlehem. After much research on the internet for the perfect directions and a trip to Hobby Lobby for bamboo from the Philippines and Japanese rice paper, we were ready to begin! The whole project took about 2 hours and was a family effort. We were pleased with the end results and plan to make one each year to help weave Jay-R's Filipino traditions into our traditions at Christmas.

The kids were happy with the finished parol. Jay-R told me, "Thank you Mommy for making my star."

I let the kids go crazy with glitter. I know it's a mess, but I love glitter and I love to see my kids getting along, working together on something.

The star frame for our parol.

My not so crafy husband hard at work cutting the bamboo into strips. He is not a crafty person but he did enjoy this project.

Ashleigh had her first band concert, a Christmas concert tonight. Afterwards, Jay-R decided to do some conducting of his own. Look at the serious expression on his face.

In her band shirt...growing up so fast...

Our annual family photo with the dancing/singing Santa at Kory's parents house. As you can see from the next picture, Jay-R loved him!

Dancing and singing with Santa

Jay-R's first visit with Santa Claus in the US. Santa visited White Cross in the Philippines, too, so Jay-R knows who Santa is. He was a little nervous about sitting on Santa's lap, but did tell Santa he wanted a car for Christmas.

Hiding under the tree...our puppy's favorite spot, too. Right now, if we can't find something, we look under the tree and Franklin has probably dragged it there!

A family photo by the Christmas tree

Trimming the tree

Jay-R with Daddy Santa

Ashleigh at my Mom & Dad's on Thanksgiving with their puppy

Jay-R and Daddy at Kory's parents on Thanksgiving

Ashleigh and Mom at Kory's parents on Thanksgiving

Ashleigh and her cousin Kelsey...I remember when these two were babies playing together...doesn't seem that long ago!

Jay-R dressed up for the Thanksgiving play the cousins performed for us

All smiles...doesn't like mashed potatoes, stuffing, or pumpkin pie, but Scotcheroos....now that's a Thanksgiving treat worth smiling about!

Jay-R's Thanksgiving Feast

Jay-R was looking rather thoughtful on our car ride to his grandparents' house on Thanksgiving Day. He had talked about Thanksgiving at school, we had talked to him about it, and we had read books. Still, we think he was trying to process what it was all about. He was excited about eating turkey and pumpkin pie. At our first Thanksgiving dinner....Jay-R's Thanksgiving feast consisted of: turkey, a roll, and a banana. For dessert, he sampled pumpkin pie only to find that he strongly disliked it. (I don't blame him!) At the second Thanksgiving feast at the other grandparents' house, his feast consisted of: turkey, grapes, corn, and blue corn chips. He did have a blast playing with all his cousins, though, even if he didn't get excited about stuffing, sweet potatoes, and pie. Friday night, we attended the parade of lights at a local town and he loved all the floats with lights. His favorite was the port-a-potty that a local rental company put over a zero radius mower. It was zipping all over the place and got quite the laugh from Jay-R! We are looking forward to one more day of Thanksgiving vacation before we all head back to work and school. I promise to post pictures from this weekend soon!

Birthday Pics

Our little man turned 6 on Friday, November 6th. Kory and I went to school and ate lunch with him. We brought McDonald's for a special treat.

Always being silly with Daddy!

The night of his birthday. My family joined us for a night of Filipino food to my best ability!!! Kory's family was sick that night but had planned on joining, too. He wanted something with chocolate and peanutbutter so I made choco-PB brownies.

While in the Philippines, we bought small items to give to him for each birthday. He picked a lot of it out but of course he doesn't remember! That shopping trip was quite the experience! He loves this little coin purse.

Gifts from his Ate Ashleigh.

The basketball hoop from Mommy and Daddy. Daddy promises nothing will be broken when they play inside. Jay-R is playing Upward basketball this winter so he'll be practicing with Daddy a lot!

That sweet smile...

The day of the big birthday party! We rented an indoor play area at a local church. Since Ashleigh's birthday is in December, we celebrated both kids b-days with family. Jay-R had friends come, too. Ashleigh is planning a sleepover with school friends closer to her b-day.

Ashleigh and Jay-R

Jay-R's cute cake that my friend Lory made. He went with a Diego theme.

Ashleigh growing up so fast!

Modeling his new robe

Another First and some good news...

Bad news first....We experienced another first with Jay-R tonight...the poor little guy vomitted....at church....in line for our annual Thanksgiving dinner. He was tired and whiny but we figured it was because the last two nights, he had gone to bed later than usual. His stomach hurt but we figured it was because he was hungry. He wasn't warm or anything. Well, he knew what he was talking about...he wasn't feeling good! Fortunately, everyone was hungry and the vomitting issue didn't dampen anyone's appetite. They just walked around it. Poor little guy is now tucked in bed sleeping.

Good news...we have a court date in December!!!! When I heard the voicemail on my cellphone yesterday, it brought tears to my eyes. Yes, this part of waiting is easy compared to the waiting before we brought Jay-R home, but there's just something special about knowing it will all be final, complete. He's been an Allison since the beginning, but it will finally be official!!!

Goodnight, Sleep Tight!

Bedtime has been and continues to be a struggle for Jay-R. When we first came home, we expected difficulty for him sleeping in his own bed. But as weeks went on, we still had issues. So, a friend suggested sitting in his room with my computer as he fell asleep (thanks Tonya!) so he had the security of knowing we were close by. Well, this became routine and it has worked. Well, he is six now, in kindergarten, and he's been with us 8 months tomorrow, Nov. 16th. Plus, he wants to spend the night at his grandparents' houses and he is definitely not ready for this. So, we are working on the going to sleep by himself in his own bed, in his own room. We are doing this in baby steps because in the long run it will be more successful and easier on all of us. So, tonight I am sitting on my computer in the hallway. He can't see me, but he knows I am here. Then, I will graduate to being in my room which is still upstairs and then to downstairs. It's just a matter of him getting used to the routine.

Sleep issues are nothing new to us. Our daughter never liked falling asleep in her own bed by herself. When she was younger, my husband worked 2nd and 3rd shifts and she often slept with me which is why it was probably hard for her to sleep by herself as she got a little older. And, Jay-R always had a room full of boys when he went to bed so falling asleep by himself is new. Each parent feels differently about sleep and each culture views it differently, too. And I know that in many cultures, children do sleep near to parent. A Filipino acquaintance told me that young children often sleep with their parents. And, I read in an adoption book that sleeping issues are actually one sign of positive attachment because the child doesn't want to separate from the parent. Many different views on sleep. And of course each child is different.

I promise I'll post birthday pics this week. There are some cute ones!!! And as for tonight, success...he is sleeping soundly!

A Lesson on Listening...

Listening continues to be one of Jay-R's biggest struggles. He always seems to have his own agenda and needs to find out the answer for himself which gets him into trouble at times. He is a bundle of non-stop energy, so much different from Ashleigh who is quiet at school.

Well, today at school Jay-R had to pull 3 tickets. To explain, each ticket is a warning...four tickets equals a trip to see the principal. Apparently, he was silly in class and had some trouble listening. Kory and I had a heart to heart serious talk about the importance of listening to his teacher and doing as he is told. We tried to explain the importance of why he needs to learn in terms he could understand. Sometimes, upcoming changes trigger behaviors in him. I don't say this to excuse the behaviour, it just helps us to understand maybe the reason behind it which helps us address it with him. Tomorrow is his teacher's last day before her 3 month pregnancy leave. He knows the sub he will have, but nonetheless, it is a change for him, and changes still kind of freak him out.

So, we talked a lot about this. Ashleigh helped him make his teacher a card and helped him write that he was sorry for not listening. At bedtime, he told me, "Mommy, I don't like being in trouble." I explained to him that all he has to do is listen and follow directions and he won't be in trouble. I told him that he needs to learn so he can grow-up to be a policeman (his current future job endeavor). He then proceeded to name all the things that policemen need to do like knowing how to write.

When he gets older, he'll probably have a fit that I shared his ornery side with the whole world, but hopefully we'll be able to look back and see how far he has come. We love this silly boy, but there is a time for silliness and a time for seriousness. Parenting is day by day learn as you go...each child is different!!! Jay-R is full of personality!!!

More Waiting....

If there is one thing that adoption does, that is to teach a person patience! You complete all your documents, mail them off, and then wait to hear you were accepted. Then, you wait for the referral. Then you get the referral and then you wait for everything to fall into place so you can travel. Lots of waiting.

Now, we are waiting for our court date to finalize Jay-R's adoption...the last official step to the adoption process. We've been told that Filipino adoption is unique because most adoptions finalize in the international country whereas Filipino adoption finalizes in the adoptive parents' country. Our lawyer has mailed the necessary documents to our county court. So, now we wait for a court date. First, we have to present the official documents to the court before the actual court date. This way, the official docs never actually leave our hands. Then, we will be given an actual court date. We are hoping all this occurs before the end of the year. What an awesome Christmas present to know that everything is final and complete!

For now, more waiting!

Weekend Recap

The weekend was wonderful. We had a great time Friday night. Jay-R did tell me that the pancuit didn't look like pancuit...I told him that Mommy did her best...and he happily ate a lot of it...in fact, he ate a lot of everything that night! That boy is growing.

Saturday, we had a great time at one of our favorite restaurant...the Back 40 Junction. I forgot my camera :( There is an old caboose car you can climb into and look around. Jay-R thought it was funny the old toilet was still in there, too!

Sunday, Kory wasn't feeling well so just the kids and I went to church. It was a beautiful day out and we enjoyed just relaxing. Kory and I finally got some pictures hung on the wall that had been sitting on the floor since June. Both of the kids have brought home their school pictures...they both have changed so much since we had pictures taken in April.

This weekend is the big birthday party. Ashleigh's birthday is in December so we are having a combined family party for their birthdays. Jay-R invited his friends, too. Ashleigh wants to have her schoolfriends for a sleepover when her birthday gets closer. We rented an indoor playarea at a local church so the kids can run off their energy and the adults can sit and relax.

What made me sad this weekend was that Jay-R said he wanted to invite Jaymark to his birthday party. Jaymark was his best bud from Whitecross. It made me so sad to hear him say that. I told him I would do what I could to find out where Jaymark is. I have hope because one of his friends adopted before him has located us and we are keeping in touch and plan to get together this summer.

Okay, back to helping Ashleigh on her 6th grade chemistry homework again...I feel like I'm in Chem 101 in college again!

Happy 6th Birthday, Jay-R!

Happy Birthday precious, silly boy that we love so much! We are so happy that today is your special day!!!

Last year on this day, we celebrated with a cake and prayed for our little boy who was half-way around the world. We prayed and we cried. Today, he is with us! For everyone waiting for your referral or to travel to get your child, have faith that your moment to share with your child will come soon!

We are celebrating with Jay-R by taking McDonald's to him at school and eating lunch with him. Tonight, some family is coming over for dinner. I am doing my best attempt at making his favorite Filipino foods: chicken adobo, pancuit, Filipino style spaghetti, Jasmine rice, and banana que. He also requested something with chocolate and peanut butter so we are having choco-PB brownies. Yummy!

Some Fall & Halloween Pics

Jay-R has been wanting to jump in leaves, and we have no trees in our yard. Trick or treat night, he kept trying to jump in people's leaves, and I had to explain that he might upset someone who spent hours raking! So, on Sunday, we visited my cousin's house who has tons of trees. He had a blast!

Showing off all his candy! His eyes were big!

My mom and dad stopped by to the see the grandkids and deliver some Halloween treats. Jay-R was Batman, and Ashleigh was chef. Ash threw together her costume in 15 minutes. They were both rather cute!

Doesn't he look tough!

Pumpkin carving night!

Daddy and Jay-R busy taking out the oozy, gooey pumpkin guts!

Melts my heart...

We were hanging out on the couch this morning, eating breakfast, watching Saturday morning cartoons, and just enjoying not having anywhere to go. Jay-R looked at me, gave me a great big hug, and said, "Thanks for coming to get me, Mommy."

Melted my heart. We talk about his adoption and his life in the Philippines openly. To hear him say that, just melted my heart. He understands that he is adopted, and that it's okay to be adopted. It helps, too, that in our small community, there are several children who are adopted in his kindergarten grade.

In the next sentence, he says, "Mommy, I want a bigger house so I can have a brother and another sister." Um, we'll have to see on that one...

Interesting Reflections on Structure...

After living in such a structured environment much of his life, Jay-R's life is now much less structured. Yes, there are routines and structure at school, daycare, and within our normal day to day living, but nothing like what he experienced at the orphanage where everything in a typical day was on a schedule. It seems like now he sometimes struggle with what to do with himself when there is not structure. For instance, at parent teacher conferences, his teacher said he does great in circle time but when doing independent desk work, he often asks to go to the bathroom and is gone awhile. And, after swim lessons, it takes him forever to come out of the boys locker room. At home, he is doing better with being able to play independently with his toys in his room, but he seldom plays independently longer than 20 minutes or so. I suppose he will become more and more used to this independent, unstructured time as he goes along day by day. And of course, he is a typical 5 year old boy full of energy! His teacher commented on how many of the other staff are amazed by his ability to tie his shoes (he often ties other children's shoes) and the gross motor skills in gym-running, skipping-things that many of the other children still struggle with. We assume this comes from having to do things for himself with so few caregivers with so many children. At home, he often won't do things by himself, though. He likes to be cared for. While we think it is important that he do some things on his own, we also understand his need to be cared for since he missed out on so much of this in his younger years. Adoption is an amazing journey. Jay-R continues to challenge us and amaze us each and every day. We love this little guy. It helps to try to look at things from his point of view to try to help him adjust to these new experiences.

Oh, a cute little ending story...Jay-R came home from the church Harvest party tonight with a bag of candy. He wasn't going to show Daddy where it was in fear that Daddy might eat his candy...Daddy has quite the sweet tooth. Jay-R can't keep secrets so he showed Daddy where his candy was. He decided to give Daddy a piece. Daddy wanted something Jay-R didn't want to give up. Jay-R looked at his Daddy and said, "Stop. You're driving me crazy!" I guess he has heard me say one too many times, "Those dogs are driving me crazy!" The things they pick up on!

Home Sweet Home!

Well, daddy survived his first time alone with the kids. I had a good conference, learned some new things I can take back to my facility, and was able to relax some. It was the first time I ever stayed alone in a hotel room by myself. I was fine...the hotel is very secure. The scary thing, though, was that the hotel less than a quarter mile down the road had a shooting the first night I was there. Some women were in a first floor room and had cracked their patio door for air. A man came in and demanded money. One of the ladies pulled a gun from her purse and shot him. It was in self-defense, and she was carrying the handgun legally. The man died in the parking lot. Even though this wasn't my hotel, I did find myself double and triple checking the locks on my door before I went to bed the next night! But, that was the precise reason I requested not to stay on the first floor...I did not want a glass patio door in my room. My third floor room suited me just fine!

Both of the kids were happy to see me as I was to see them. Jay-R jumped in my arms at daycare when we picked him up. We spent the weekend at soccer games and Saturday night at Cedar Point. I forgot my camera, but my mom got some great pics. The park was busy, but we were able to ride some of our favorites. The Raptor which is my favorite because I love my feet dangling was open which made me happy! It had been closed when we went in June. Ash and I tried a new roller coaster, the Mantis, where you stand up. We waited an hour for that ride-I didn't like it! It was fun watching Jay-R go on all the kiddie rides, too. Mom and I went with Jay-R so Ashleigh, Kory, and my dad could do the Halloween scary houses. We all had a great time. We're all a little tired now, and Jay-R has a tummyache but hopefully a good night's sleep has him feeling better in the morning.

Tomorrow marks a new week. Jay-R will be doing swimming lessons at the high school. He's a little nervous but I'm hoping he learns the basics with us and both grandparents having a pool. Our high school offers lessons for $5, so I couldn't pass that up. He loves water, so it should be a good experience. I'll let you know!

Another First....

I hate the thought of leaving these smiling faces for a few days...

Another First....I leave Wednesday bright and early to go to a conference three hours from home. I always go every October to get my CEUs that I need to keep my job certification. It's a great time to gain new knowledge, get refreshed, and network with others in the field. But, it means leaving home for a couple days. I get home Friday afternoon. I have never left Jay-R overnight before so this will be a new experience. Of course, by now, he has learned that when Mommy leaves, she always comes back but she's always there at bedtime! Hubby got a little practice playing single daddy last week when I was ill so hopefully things go smoothly when I'm gone. I tried to explain it to Jay-R in terms he would understand and told him Mommy's work was sending her to school for a few days at a hotel. This morning when I took him to school, before he got out of the car, he said, "Mommy, you going to school today?" "No, honey, just work." "Okay, bye, love you!" I knew this would cause him some anxiety, and he's been asking about it, but they'll be okay. Ashleigh and Kory don't like it when I'm gone, either. I joke with them that they miss someone cooking for them! Ashleigh did appreciate the homecooked meal last night even if it was just spaghetti...Daddy's not much of a cook! Please pray for my family and my safe travels!

Mommy the Nurturer, Daddy the Protector...

I still wasn't feeling up to par Friday night, so I designated it as Family Movie Night minus Daddy who had to go to bed extra early to get up for work Saturday. With Jay-R's new fascination with hot chocolate, love of trains, and excitement for Christmas, we opted to watch Polar Express. He sat with his eyes glued to the TV. The ghost/hobo scenes scared him a little, but he cuddled with me which of course I loved. Towards the end of the movie, Ashleigh asked him an interesting question...
A: "So, Jay-R, if the Polar Express stops here to pick you up, are you going to get on?"
J: (some hesitation, wide eyes, and a soft voice) "Nooo."
A: "What are you going to do?"
J: (without any hesitation and much louder) "I'm gonna get my Daddy!"

Mommy the nurturer to cuddle with during the movie and Daddy the protector to save the day should the movie come to life! No, he's not scared of Santa, just the idea of being whisked away on a big train!

Oh, I can't wait to share Christmas traditions with him! I was researching directions on how to make Filipino Christmas star lanterns, parols, and found lots of different ideas, but they all call for bamboo pieces...does anyone know, can you get those at a craft store like Hobby Lobby? We want to incorporate parol making as part of our annual Christmas traditions.

Catching Up...

We have been so busy with soccer games and practices, there hasn't been much free time lately. Until today...I've been stuck home all day with a fever. I rarely get sick. All I've done today is sleep, and I'm not a TV person so I figure this is the perfect time to catch up the blog. Here are some pictures from our Labor Day weekend trip to the Great Smoky Mountains with my family. Thanks Mom & Dad for a great trip! We had a great time!

My sister and Ashleigh. Ash is getting so tall!

Family photo inside the cabin.

A view of the mountains from atop the Space Needle. You can see the smoke rising from the mountains, henceforth the name-"Great Smoky Mountains."

Family photo atop the Space Needle. I hated that thing. I do not like heights and looking down just about made me sick! Jay-R and I went down before everyone else did and played some games in the arcade. My family saw a person hit by a car after we had already went down. The person was okay. There were sooo many people there Labor Day weekend, and traffic was thick!

Taking a short break.

Ash and I at the Apple Barn, our favorite restaurant there. The apple fritters and apple butter are wonderful!

Okay, I realize this pic is dark but it's the best shot I could get. Look at the left top of the photo-you will see a dark black blob. This is a baby bear who joined us on the trail to the Laurel Falls. I have been to Tennesse many times and have never seen a bear on the trail. Everyone stayed quiet and calm. And thankfully, mama bear was no where in sight!

Jay-R posing in his new, cool blue shades!

Ate and Jay-R on the Sugarlands Trail.