Interesting Reflections on Structure...

After living in such a structured environment much of his life, Jay-R's life is now much less structured. Yes, there are routines and structure at school, daycare, and within our normal day to day living, but nothing like what he experienced at the orphanage where everything in a typical day was on a schedule. It seems like now he sometimes struggle with what to do with himself when there is not structure. For instance, at parent teacher conferences, his teacher said he does great in circle time but when doing independent desk work, he often asks to go to the bathroom and is gone awhile. And, after swim lessons, it takes him forever to come out of the boys locker room. At home, he is doing better with being able to play independently with his toys in his room, but he seldom plays independently longer than 20 minutes or so. I suppose he will become more and more used to this independent, unstructured time as he goes along day by day. And of course, he is a typical 5 year old boy full of energy! His teacher commented on how many of the other staff are amazed by his ability to tie his shoes (he often ties other children's shoes) and the gross motor skills in gym-running, skipping-things that many of the other children still struggle with. We assume this comes from having to do things for himself with so few caregivers with so many children. At home, he often won't do things by himself, though. He likes to be cared for. While we think it is important that he do some things on his own, we also understand his need to be cared for since he missed out on so much of this in his younger years. Adoption is an amazing journey. Jay-R continues to challenge us and amaze us each and every day. We love this little guy. It helps to try to look at things from his point of view to try to help him adjust to these new experiences.

Oh, a cute little ending story...Jay-R came home from the church Harvest party tonight with a bag of candy. He wasn't going to show Daddy where it was in fear that Daddy might eat his candy...Daddy has quite the sweet tooth. Jay-R can't keep secrets so he showed Daddy where his candy was. He decided to give Daddy a piece. Daddy wanted something Jay-R didn't want to give up. Jay-R looked at his Daddy and said, "Stop. You're driving me crazy!" I guess he has heard me say one too many times, "Those dogs are driving me crazy!" The things they pick up on!