Jay-R's Thanksgiving Feast

Jay-R was looking rather thoughtful on our car ride to his grandparents' house on Thanksgiving Day. He had talked about Thanksgiving at school, we had talked to him about it, and we had read books. Still, we think he was trying to process what it was all about. He was excited about eating turkey and pumpkin pie. At our first Thanksgiving dinner....Jay-R's Thanksgiving feast consisted of: turkey, a roll, and a banana. For dessert, he sampled pumpkin pie only to find that he strongly disliked it. (I don't blame him!) At the second Thanksgiving feast at the other grandparents' house, his feast consisted of: turkey, grapes, corn, and blue corn chips. He did have a blast playing with all his cousins, though, even if he didn't get excited about stuffing, sweet potatoes, and pie. Friday night, we attended the parade of lights at a local town and he loved all the floats with lights. His favorite was the port-a-potty that a local rental company put over a zero radius mower. It was zipping all over the place and got quite the laugh from Jay-R! We are looking forward to one more day of Thanksgiving vacation before we all head back to work and school. I promise to post pictures from this weekend soon!

Birthday Pics

Our little man turned 6 on Friday, November 6th. Kory and I went to school and ate lunch with him. We brought McDonald's for a special treat.

Always being silly with Daddy!

The night of his birthday. My family joined us for a night of Filipino food to my best ability!!! Kory's family was sick that night but had planned on joining, too. He wanted something with chocolate and peanutbutter so I made choco-PB brownies.

While in the Philippines, we bought small items to give to him for each birthday. He picked a lot of it out but of course he doesn't remember! That shopping trip was quite the experience! He loves this little coin purse.

Gifts from his Ate Ashleigh.

The basketball hoop from Mommy and Daddy. Daddy promises nothing will be broken when they play inside. Jay-R is playing Upward basketball this winter so he'll be practicing with Daddy a lot!

That sweet smile...

The day of the big birthday party! We rented an indoor play area at a local church. Since Ashleigh's birthday is in December, we celebrated both kids b-days with family. Jay-R had friends come, too. Ashleigh is planning a sleepover with school friends closer to her b-day.

Ashleigh and Jay-R

Jay-R's cute cake that my friend Lory made. He went with a Diego theme.

Ashleigh growing up so fast!

Modeling his new robe

Another First and some good news...

Bad news first....We experienced another first with Jay-R tonight...the poor little guy vomitted....at church....in line for our annual Thanksgiving dinner. He was tired and whiny but we figured it was because the last two nights, he had gone to bed later than usual. His stomach hurt but we figured it was because he was hungry. He wasn't warm or anything. Well, he knew what he was talking about...he wasn't feeling good! Fortunately, everyone was hungry and the vomitting issue didn't dampen anyone's appetite. They just walked around it. Poor little guy is now tucked in bed sleeping.

Good news...we have a court date in December!!!! When I heard the voicemail on my cellphone yesterday, it brought tears to my eyes. Yes, this part of waiting is easy compared to the waiting before we brought Jay-R home, but there's just something special about knowing it will all be final, complete. He's been an Allison since the beginning, but it will finally be official!!!

Goodnight, Sleep Tight!

Bedtime has been and continues to be a struggle for Jay-R. When we first came home, we expected difficulty for him sleeping in his own bed. But as weeks went on, we still had issues. So, a friend suggested sitting in his room with my computer as he fell asleep (thanks Tonya!) so he had the security of knowing we were close by. Well, this became routine and it has worked. Well, he is six now, in kindergarten, and he's been with us 8 months tomorrow, Nov. 16th. Plus, he wants to spend the night at his grandparents' houses and he is definitely not ready for this. So, we are working on the going to sleep by himself in his own bed, in his own room. We are doing this in baby steps because in the long run it will be more successful and easier on all of us. So, tonight I am sitting on my computer in the hallway. He can't see me, but he knows I am here. Then, I will graduate to being in my room which is still upstairs and then to downstairs. It's just a matter of him getting used to the routine.

Sleep issues are nothing new to us. Our daughter never liked falling asleep in her own bed by herself. When she was younger, my husband worked 2nd and 3rd shifts and she often slept with me which is why it was probably hard for her to sleep by herself as she got a little older. And, Jay-R always had a room full of boys when he went to bed so falling asleep by himself is new. Each parent feels differently about sleep and each culture views it differently, too. And I know that in many cultures, children do sleep near to parent. A Filipino acquaintance told me that young children often sleep with their parents. And, I read in an adoption book that sleeping issues are actually one sign of positive attachment because the child doesn't want to separate from the parent. Many different views on sleep. And of course each child is different.

I promise I'll post birthday pics this week. There are some cute ones!!! And as for tonight, success...he is sleeping soundly!

A Lesson on Listening...

Listening continues to be one of Jay-R's biggest struggles. He always seems to have his own agenda and needs to find out the answer for himself which gets him into trouble at times. He is a bundle of non-stop energy, so much different from Ashleigh who is quiet at school.

Well, today at school Jay-R had to pull 3 tickets. To explain, each ticket is a warning...four tickets equals a trip to see the principal. Apparently, he was silly in class and had some trouble listening. Kory and I had a heart to heart serious talk about the importance of listening to his teacher and doing as he is told. We tried to explain the importance of why he needs to learn in terms he could understand. Sometimes, upcoming changes trigger behaviors in him. I don't say this to excuse the behaviour, it just helps us to understand maybe the reason behind it which helps us address it with him. Tomorrow is his teacher's last day before her 3 month pregnancy leave. He knows the sub he will have, but nonetheless, it is a change for him, and changes still kind of freak him out.

So, we talked a lot about this. Ashleigh helped him make his teacher a card and helped him write that he was sorry for not listening. At bedtime, he told me, "Mommy, I don't like being in trouble." I explained to him that all he has to do is listen and follow directions and he won't be in trouble. I told him that he needs to learn so he can grow-up to be a policeman (his current future job endeavor). He then proceeded to name all the things that policemen need to do like knowing how to write.

When he gets older, he'll probably have a fit that I shared his ornery side with the whole world, but hopefully we'll be able to look back and see how far he has come. We love this silly boy, but there is a time for silliness and a time for seriousness. Parenting is day by day learn as you go...each child is different!!! Jay-R is full of personality!!!

More Waiting....

If there is one thing that adoption does, that is to teach a person patience! You complete all your documents, mail them off, and then wait to hear you were accepted. Then, you wait for the referral. Then you get the referral and then you wait for everything to fall into place so you can travel. Lots of waiting.

Now, we are waiting for our court date to finalize Jay-R's adoption...the last official step to the adoption process. We've been told that Filipino adoption is unique because most adoptions finalize in the international country whereas Filipino adoption finalizes in the adoptive parents' country. Our lawyer has mailed the necessary documents to our county court. So, now we wait for a court date. First, we have to present the official documents to the court before the actual court date. This way, the official docs never actually leave our hands. Then, we will be given an actual court date. We are hoping all this occurs before the end of the year. What an awesome Christmas present to know that everything is final and complete!

For now, more waiting!

Weekend Recap

The weekend was wonderful. We had a great time Friday night. Jay-R did tell me that the pancuit didn't look like pancuit...I told him that Mommy did her best...and he happily ate a lot of it...in fact, he ate a lot of everything that night! That boy is growing.

Saturday, we had a great time at one of our favorite restaurant...the Back 40 Junction. I forgot my camera :( There is an old caboose car you can climb into and look around. Jay-R thought it was funny the old toilet was still in there, too!

Sunday, Kory wasn't feeling well so just the kids and I went to church. It was a beautiful day out and we enjoyed just relaxing. Kory and I finally got some pictures hung on the wall that had been sitting on the floor since June. Both of the kids have brought home their school pictures...they both have changed so much since we had pictures taken in April.

This weekend is the big birthday party. Ashleigh's birthday is in December so we are having a combined family party for their birthdays. Jay-R invited his friends, too. Ashleigh wants to have her schoolfriends for a sleepover when her birthday gets closer. We rented an indoor playarea at a local church so the kids can run off their energy and the adults can sit and relax.

What made me sad this weekend was that Jay-R said he wanted to invite Jaymark to his birthday party. Jaymark was his best bud from Whitecross. It made me so sad to hear him say that. I told him I would do what I could to find out where Jaymark is. I have hope because one of his friends adopted before him has located us and we are keeping in touch and plan to get together this summer.

Okay, back to helping Ashleigh on her 6th grade chemistry homework again...I feel like I'm in Chem 101 in college again!